June 27, 2009
The London Times reports that the parking lot attendant at the Bristol Zoo worked faithfully, seven days a week for 25 years. Then one day he failed to show up for work.
None of the zoo employees know the attendant’s name. They referred to him only as “Guv,” a British custom for an official whose name no one knew.
Zoo officials contacted Bristol town officials to ask for a replacement for the missing parking lot attendant. Townsmen said the attendant was employed by the Bristol Zoo. “Not so,” says the zoo director.
Zoo people check the attendant’s booth and the ticket machine but find nothing that will lead to finding the absent attendant or the name of his employer.
Then it dawns on Bristol officials: “If Guv doesn’t work for the zoo and he doesn’t for the town -- then who on earth does he work for?”
A light switch goes on when the town realizes that Guv has pocketed the parking lot money and flown the coop. Rapid calculation reveals that with parking fees averaging £400 per day for cars and buses the estimated total is $660 a day in US dollars.
Didn’t anybody check to see where the money was going? Apparently not because the town thinks Guv works for the zoo, and the zoo people thinks he works for the town. Nothing was suspicious until Guv didn’t show up for work.
Where’s Guv now? Your guess is as good as anybody’s. Maybe he’s on the coast of Spain, or Argentina, or anywhere on Planet Earth. If you do the math you’ll find that Guv’s retirement stash comes to a handsome sum of more than $6 million U.S. Not bad for 25 years of faithful -- or unfaithful -- service.
Posted by Bob Ford at 6/27/2009