February 14, 2010
A teen gets mixed up with the wrong crowd, gets in trouble with the law, and is now serving time as a youthful offender. Now It's visitor's day at the prison and our young criminal, we'll call him Junior, is hoping his Mama will show up with some goodies.
What Junior doesn't understand is that most goodies are considered contraband by the prison. Junior has been writing home telling Mama how terrible the food is.
Actually the food at the prison is planned by a state- certified nutritionist and is far healthier than most of the inmates ate at home. But by Junior's standard a meal isn't worth eating unless it includes well-done meat, mashed potatoes and gravy. Junior considers gravy a beverage and consumes it by the pint.
Outside the prison gates, friends and parents are lined up waiting to see their incarcerated kin. Junior's Mama is near the front of the line. She appears to be quite buxom and more than a little bit pregnant.
Standing with the prison guards are two drug dogs. These K-9s are trained to intercept drugs and nothing more. The dogs are insurance that no unlawful drugs will enter the prison compound.
This day the dogs are acting strangely. They're not "hitting" on Mama for drugs. But they're wagging their tails and drooling in happy recognition of her arrival.
Mama is questioned and soon admits that she's hiding "some of Junior's delights." She follows a female guard into a room where she removes from concealed places under her dress are two pork loins and one baked ham.
Mama is not arrested and she is permitted to visit Junior but without the goodies. Not sure what happened to the pork loins and ham.
Posted by Bob Ford at 2/14/2010