January 15, 2009

Prince of slumber

They called him Beetle because he was so lazy. But when he set his
mind to it, Beetle had the "stuff" to be a good cop. Like the time he
captured an armed robber.
Calling out from behind a parked car, Beetle convinces the bandit that
the SWAT team is already in position and ready to "take him out" if he
doesn't lay down his weapon, raise his hands and walk out of the store
backwards. The frightened robber does exactly as Beetle orders.
Then there's that cold wintry morning a few hours before dawn. Beetle is
parked in his patrol car on the top of a hill overlooking the downtown
area. He turns off the patrol car's lights, cracks one window to allow
for fresh air, then settles in for a warm winter's nap.
The shift sergeant knows Beetle's penchant for snoozing on duty and is
constantly on the alert for such a caper. Sleeping on watch gets you a
three-day suspension without pay.
This night the sergeant spots Beetle's darkened patrol car. Determined
to catch him in the act, Sarge parks his own patrol car on a side
street, tiptoes up behind Beetle, being careful to stay in a blind spot
so he wouldn't be seen.
Beetle appears to be in deep slumber. Ever so slowly the sergeant
presses on the door handle trying not to make a sound.
There's a tiny squeak as the door opens. The sound is just enough to
alert the slumbering Beetle, who is never — even at the moment of
awakening — at a loss for action.
Sarge, viewing this Prince of Slumber with his head down and hands
crossed, thinks he's finally got Beetle.
At that very moment Beetle says, ever so reverently, "And please, Lord,
bless my sergeant and his lovely family and keep them out of harm's way."

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